i knew something was off. Maybe it was my new mothers instinct kicking in. I dont know. Here I was...I had just quit my job of 12 years to take on this thing called motherhood. I was blessed with a precious baby girl who was breathtakingly beautiful with eyes the color of the clearest ocean. I immediately fell in love with her the moment I met her. HOwever...from the begining we met several challenges. Bless the babys heart, she had reflux from the moment she arrived. We saw specialists and finally got her medicine to help. NO matter what we did she never seemed to settle. She was always set on go. NOthing could calm her, she didnt sleep and neither did we (husband and I). So...skipping to now and my desire to write this...my first love is now four. We also have a sweet souled two year old girl. We knew the addition of our second love was going to be quite an adjustment for our four year old. We tried to make the transition as easy as possible. We set aside time for one on one time with our oldest and tried to let her help with all things baby as much as possible. HOwever, it was becoming apparent that her resentment was starting to take over. At least that is what we first thought. As time went on and lil sis was here with us for a almost a year and a half I began thinking that there had to be more to the story. Something was off. I was having difficulty getting her to listen, or follow rules. She became hostile, argumentative and mouthy. Her backtalking was incessant. We tried everything. We tried time out, taking toys away, sending her to her room, and even the dreaded spanking. Nothing worked. I finally started doing research and after reading the signs and symptoms of ADHD, I came to the conclusion that this disorder was something we may have to face. SO...here I am writing because I dont know what else to do to make all of this make sense to me. I feel that writing this all down will somehow allow me to express my frustrations for me and most of all for my precious girl.
I want nothing more than to help my little girl. I want her to wake up everyday with joy in her heart and a smile on her face, but that is not often our reality. Most mornings she is either extrememly tired and demanding because she has not slept well, or she is going from zero to sixty because she has all this energy pent up that she feels she has to get out the moment her feet hit the ground. They say routine is a must for kids with ADHD. This is my hurtle to jump as I am not usually a structured person. I guess I am going to have to be and want to be if it will help my girl.
So...tomrorow I will begin my life with structure. Wish me luck.
